It seems like Evan and I are walking an interesting line between the traditional and non-traditional weddings. For me, it feels like our wedding is really traditional- we’re getting married in a Catholic Church, we’re having dinner and dancing afterwards, our guest list contains distant relatives that we don’t know very well, etc. And honestly- I mean, we’re not having a rustic chic barn wedding, I’m not wearing a colorful dress, we’re not having a food truck…all in all, I would never suggest that we’re not having anything other than a ‘traditional’ wedding.
The more details I share with other people, though, the more they suggest that we’re not doing it the ‘right’ way. To be specific, whenever I suggest something that even slightly controversial, someone will say something to the effect of ‘but that’s just not done’ as though I’ve suggested something incredibly heinous and tacky. And I have to say…I’m pretty sick of it. My wedding is not going to be tacky just because were eating pie! I’m putting together a really lovely day full of things that will make my guests happy, so really- piss off if that’s not how it’s done. Welcome to my ‘it’s MY day’ moment.
Examples: I’m having hair and makeup people come to our house, rather than going to a salon. It’s a personal preference designed to keep me as calm and organized as possible, rather than trying to make sure that ten people arrive at the designated place at a designated time. It may not be a common option but, come on. It’s not that crazy.
Second- I picked a bridal party, but it doesn’t include anywhere near all of the women who are important in my life. So…I’ve invited everyone to spend the night before the wedding at my house. I have four bedrooms and a few couches, and it will be one big ladies slumber party. Whoever doesn’t want to spend the night is more than welcome to come over in the morning to get ready. This isn’t a bridal decree- it’s just a fun night. I’m sorry that you don’t think it’s a good idea, but…I think it sounds fun!
Third- our reception is in a converted warehouse. People are getting over this by now, most likely because we’ve already put down the deposit, but you would not even believe the number of times that I had to listen to people try to talk me into a hotel or country club when we started planning. I know that’s what those places exist for, but I also cannot imagine having my wedding in a hotel ballroom. That’s just so incredibly not Mr G or I.
Fourth- wedding traditions. Yes, we’re doing a first look. No, it won’t make the walk down the aisle any less special. No, we’re not doing a garter or bouquet toss and no, I will not ever regret it- they make people uncomfortable. Why no, we are certainly not having an incredibly awkward wedding party table where everyone is seated on one side like some sort of stage, or something. No, I could not possibly care that it’s just what people do. Back off, no one will die.
Fifth- we’re serving food family style. Plated service is more expensive, takes ages, and is pretty formal. A buffet also takes ages and…it’s a buffet. I really don’t want to have to worry about carrying around a plate of food that I’m more than likely to spill down the front of my dress. Also, I like serving food family style! You have to pass plates, and ask for things and interact and be friends with your table mates. Also, you can pick exactly what you want to eat, and what you don’t want on your plate. So, relax everyone- it’s really fun!
Ok, that’s about the end of my rant. I guess, when we started planning, I didn’t realize that so many people would have so many opinions about how we should celebrate our wedding. I mean- I’m a grown up, I’ve thrown dinner parties, I know what I like and what I don’t like, and I just want people to have a great time. Do people doubt that Evan and I can plan this event, or is it just so important that they each add their own two cents? Jeez 🙂